Yuku free message boards

August 26, my sister's birthday. Happy birthday seestor!

We open on the Chenbot sporting the latest hooker fashions from Blade Runner. She also looks as though she might have dressed with tonights Young & the Restless Americas Choice Reveal, as the entire ensemble is Soap-Slut-tastic: tight red mini dress with bizarre cutouts around the neck & cleave; shiny, pointy white mules with red bow and gold bow detail; and, best of all, the gaudiest red clip-on earrings everperfect for whipping off for that Overly! Dramatic! Phone Call!

But I digress.

Okay, so we had previouslies, with the Overly Dramatic Announcer Guy wondering how Nakomiss nomination of CB will play out. Now weve got Julie going over the possible scenarios again. And guess what comes after that? Why, its more reactions to the Cowboy Nomination.

CB DRs that Nakomis broke a promise; Nakomis DRs the same, only justifies it by saying hes safe this week. Back in the Lodge, CB bonds with The TOD and they all have a nice cry. Nat asks, Arent we just a bunch of sad puppies? To which CB replies, No we have hearts. For me to poop on!!!! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

And the mad campaigning begins again. Some more. She talks to Drew about who has his back, really, and lays it on thick. Later, for fun, Marvin fucks with CB and tells him that he might not be a sure thing. You know how devious these chicks are. He goes on to say that hes got to make sure that Drew gets Diane on board with voting Adria out, or else it could be bye bye Cowboy.

In the bathroom, Drew and Diane get all angsty. Drew does some easy math and counts to four, while Diane bitches more about broken promises. Ever notice how Drew points a lot when hes trying to make a, well, point? I wonder if he picked that firm gesture up in Aktin Skul? Tension mounts when CB actually exits the WC following their argument, which leads me to believe he was in there the whole time and Drew and Di am dumb. He wears an expression in the mirror that would be characterized as wising up if it were worn by almost anybody else. Later in the kitchen, after trying to convince Diane to vote him out, Drew tells Cowboy that he is safe. Ooh, that duplicitous bitch.

JC talks with Nakomis in HOH. No, the other JC, Julie. Jesus is sending that twin-hating bitch straight to hell. Chen points out to Nak that she broke her promise to her brother, after nominating the twins for breaking promises. Nakomis justifies by saying that she & her bro chatted before he went up & he said he was all good.

Pre-voting blathering in the DR ensues. Adria: Natalie is real. Karen: Natalie has lied and admitted that shes lied. Adria: Cowboy is an all-around great guy he does not turn away from someone when their down. Karen: Cowboy is a snitch. Cowboy will crawl up the butt of anyone that will make him feel protected. A cries: Natalie is my sister blahdi blah. Karen gravely intones: Their alliance is unbeatable.

Then it's time for the announcement of who won the guest spot on the Young & the Restless. The names are displayed on the LR screen, and CB stares at it with determination? Worry? Does he have to pee? I cant tell, but they actually arrange it so the last two names are Michael and Marvin. CBs expression is officially nervous. And the winner is Marvin! Ha ha! Haaaa ha ha ha! Marvin is so thrilled he jumps around and then cries tears of joy for the first time in his life. Cowboy's face? Is priceless. He is CRUSHED. Dude, I think he almost cried. Hee. Im so mean.

We tag along w/ Marvin to the Y & R set to see just how gracious the women in the cast can be when confronted with his particular brand of Crass and Lewd. They do really, really well, I must say. Hes greeted by Melody Nikki Newman Thomas Scott who gives him a hug and proceeds to be sweet and gracious, and also ignore him when he blatantly checks out her ass. He rehearses the line, You got it, until its perfected, Marvin-style (You got it, dammit). He changes into costume and dude, homeslice has NOT spent enough time in the BB house with his shirt off, mmkay? (What? If he can do it, Doom can do it.) Then he flirts with the makeup artist, saying shes turning him into the black Brad Pitt, or Bar-be-cue Pitt. *snicker*

Back at the house, Nakomis comforts a mopey-sally Cowboy who says that Marvin (sniff) deserved it in the most unconvincing possible way. Heeeee hee. Im still mean.

The PA leads him to Stage 41 where he calls people playa and girl and tells Victoria Drucilla Barber Winters Rowell, Ill be all up on your set. No, really. He rehearses his scene with Christian Michael Baldwin LeBlanc and Michelle Phyllis Summers Abbott Stafford at the gym and what is up with all the three-named women? The scene wraps and he confesses to the camera just how excited and happy he is. And despite everything I just said about him, its kinda sweet.

Marvin returns to the house to a clustered group of pathetic house-mates in the backyard, answers all their questions, & talks about how much fun he had. When Drew finds out that people recognized Marvin, he frats out with excitement at the thought of all his fans. Isnt delusion fun? For me, anyway. They go into the living room to watch the scene. It's bad. It's awful. It's pathetic and stupid and, and...dear lord. Reason number 6,573 why non-actors shouldn't be on TV: that scene. And that goes for Marvin, too. Hey-o! The houseguests, of course, fall over themselves to complement him, and he just looks pleased as punch. Aw.

Oh, to see this LIVE on the Young & the Restless, set your TiVO to record the episode on Monday, August 30.

Chen asks Marvin about his experience and he says it was fabulous and thoughtfully thanks everyone involved, displaying exactly the kind of manners he probably should have exhibited, I don't know, on the set. Julie reveals that Drew came in 2nd & asks how he feels--he thanks his fans. *snort* She moves on to rub salt, lemon juice and Tabasco in Cowboy's festering hemorrhoid of disappointment and, while he claims good sportsmanship (and maintains that hell have other chances outside of the house), inside his heart is broken into pieces and he is just a sad, sad little Cowboy. You know what would cheer you up Michael? Picture yourself as a buff gym owner on a soap opera. I know that had me rolling for hours.

In the DR, Drew, Diane & Marvin blather about Cowboy and Natalie.

It's time for Will in Sequesterville! Hi Will! *hugs* First we see scenes of a tropical paradise filled with beaches, blue skies, flowers and tiki torches... and then cut to Will in a rickety hut in the middle of Death Valley Desert, battling a viscous gang of vultures for his next meal of rotted corpse. Welcome to the Jury, SUCKA! Mwah ha ha ha ha haaaa!

Except, you know, not. The sequester house is gorgeous, Will loves it, and fawns over it appropriately. He finds a brick hallway outside and snots, Cold, dirty, dark, hard? Yeah this is the perfect place for Adria to sleep! And we can fit Natalie over there in the corner! Ah, Will. So bitchy. I just love ya. While he finds that the sheer beauty has the BB House beat ten-fold, he still wishes he were back there fighting for the prize.

Nominee speeches: they're long and theyre stupid. It's time to vote live.

Karen, Marvin, Diane and Drew all vote to evict Nat. Julie announces that Natalie has been evicted, and my fiancee says, "That's what you get for walking around being a bitch all week."

Nat leaves with a God bless you all, and A turns a cartwheel and says, SUCK IT, LOSER! No, she does not either. She cries. Karen cries. Cowboy cries.

Nat's interview with Julie is predictably self-righteous and long-winded. She belittles the other HGs, refers to herself in the third person and doesnt give Julie one straight answer. She does, however, admit that she thought Nakomis was unfair not because she didnt give Natalie a reason, but because she didnt give her the reason she wanted to hear. Taped goodbyes are predictable and short. CB & Drew refer to her as a sister, A-hole cries, Karen cries. The interview concludes as Julie says, You played a good game, and Natalie answers, Yes. Thank you.

Next America's Choice: Who do we want to win a phone call from home? Vote NOW on cbs.com.

HOH Competition is "Putting for Power." Heh. Putting. Hee hee! I'm 12. Basically there are 2 rounds. First round, 2 groups of 3 compete against each other to get the first ball in the hole. Hee! Ball. Hole. Okay, I'll stop. Group 1 is Cowboy, Drew & Diane and CB sinks a hole in one on the first try. Group 2 is Adria, Karen, and Marvin, and after a few swings, Marvin is named the winner. As for the Marvin or Karen? Controversy, my TiVO says the winner was Karen. According to Julies Rules, the first ball to make it all the way to the bottom of the tube wins, but I watched it in slow-mo, and Karens definitely dropped all the way first, as Marvins circled around a bit. You can hear it drop, but it might have been tough to call, as the camera panned up on Marvins green very quickly, and the tubes they were showing us look animated, like they werent the real tubes. Its fishy alright.

Regardless, Round 2 features Marvin vs. Cowboy, and whoever gets the most balls in the hole in 60 seconds wins. As it turns out, Drew, Marvin's the one whose balls you shouldn't question, as he wipes the green with Cowboy's ASS and beats him 4 balls to 1.

Marvin is the new HOH. He celebrates by showing off the dumbass BB5 logo he shaved into his head, jumping in the pool and dancing around the BY, swinging the HOH key around.

There will be no Saturday episode this week. Next ep is Tuesday, August 31, one hour earlier at 8PM ET/PT.